I have been wondering that countless people can write books on this particular question as they live with one but mostly people don’t even mention such embarrassing things, forget about writing an account on it. It has nothing to do with honesty or bravery. The thing is…most people will take you as an attention seeker or they won’t believe your story & even if they do, they might find faults with you & your choices, & some will just sympathize with you like idiots. You don’t need that.
Dysfunctional people make your life a living hell & they mostly get away with it as well. Some are married to crazy people. Some are related to psychotic beings. We come across bullies & psychotic creatures almost every day. It starts off when we are just kids at schools…we have those bullies that always get away with it. We also encounter totally crazy people at the work place & these days cyber stalking can give you headaches too cause some psychopaths have nothing better to do; they waste away years on you in their desperation. But in these cases, at least you don’t live with that mad person.
When you’re married to one such creature, you at least have an option of running away but many people suffer for years. Some are just helpless. Maybe they have no one to bank on & usually the case is that you have just no one. Of course there are people in name but they don’t exist when you need them the most. When you’re related to dysfunctional beings, the mental agony you suffer is for lifetime. There is just no getting away with it. These people emotionally abuse you. They hit you at every opportunity. They demoralize you for your choices. They find faults in you all the time. You live with fear& stress, & that’s not healthy at all. And if you’re waiting for someone to help or understand you, you’re in for a big surprise. No one has time for you in this materialistic age as everything is weighed when it comes to commitments & making good deals. Most probably, you just don’t happen to be a good option. We have all heard how people ditch those when they let them know about their problems. Look at the irony…you trust the person & he/she abandons you just like that.
I have read about cases in which fathers raped their children for years. In some, they have kept them locked up in a room for years. Is that what you expect of your family? People who were supposed to protect you are the ones who eat you away just like vultures while you’re alive. There are instances when they don’t sexually exploit you but they beat you every time you provide them an opportunity. And I don’t think such victims will expect much of the world. It’s just that when you are suffering from deep set insecurity, you also don’t find anyone to love or protect you.
In books too, I have read about characters who just suffer & suffer, & there is no end to it. In fact their dying experience is also equally horrendous. Not a single good thing happens but bad luck follows them everywhere. Some people kill their oppressors & land in jail. Some commit suicide & the world calls them weak & very conveniently regard them as people having no faith at all. Running away is the 3rd option but you’ve got to be extremely lucky to make that click & the chances are that you’re not that lucky, to begin with. Otherwise why would you be in such a mess?
They say everything is possible. You just have to have faith in yourself but now I question it. I have doubts about it. I don’t have time for crappy statements that life is not fair. Some people suffer forever & they die just like that. It’s a sin to judge them (I mention it cause some people only judge others), cause you don’t know what kind of lives they have lived & why they are the way they are. I have met some people on the net who have got dysfunctional families & things just never get better for them. Many a time, they sound crazy as well but the fact is…they put up with shit all the time & they need to vent it out somewhere. Maybe that’s why we read dramatic statuses. I said in one of my posts that I don’t care about what I read but it’s not true. I do. Of course the ones who just scribble bitchy & judgmental stuff, I have no time for such losers. Yeah right I have my school teacher in my mind. People like her force others to take drastic measures. A person who is already sad doesn’t need your judgment & crappy opinion.
Maybe we don’t have any answer to the question I asked in my title. Maybe it’s different for different people in different situations. Can ignoring such beings help at all? But how can it when the psychotic creature has you at the back of his/her mind?
The next question is: how to stay happy when you don’t have a single reason to smile? There I suppose victims do have some options. You can always work on happiness no matter how bad the situation is. A little bit of humor & kindness can make a hell of a difference I suppose. Anyhow, I don’t have any clear cut answer & unfortunately I can’t write a book on it either. I haven’t suffered that much. I see people & I wonder how come no one comes to their aid. They say everything happens for a reason but what good is there in such cases?
